少年维特的烦恼-第10部分

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heavier　disease　and　a　more　painful　death，　or　who　can　exult　over　the　despairing
mind　of　a　sinner，　who，　to　obtain　peace　of　conscience　and　an　alleviation
of　misery　，　makes　a　pilgrimage　to　the　Holy　Sepulchre。　Each　laborious
step　which　galls　his　wounded　feet　in　rough　and　untrodden　paths　pours　a
drop　of　balm　into　his　troubled　soul　，　and　the　journey　of　many　a　weary
day　brings　a　nightly　relief　to　his　anguished　heart。　Will　you　dare　call
this　enthusiasm　，　ye　crowd　of　pompous　declaimers　？　Enthusiasm　！　0　God！
thou　seest　my　tears。　Thou　hast　allotted　us　our　portion　of　misery：　must
we　also　have　brethren　to　persecute　us　，　to　deprive　us　of　our　consolation，
of　our　trust　in　thee，　and　in　thy　love　and　mercy？　For　our　trust　in　the
virtue　of　the　healing　root，　or　in　the　strength　of　the　vine　，　what　is
it　else　than　a　belief　in　thee　from　whom　all　that　surrounds　us　derives
its　healing　and　restoring　powers？　Father　，　whom　I　know　not，——　who
wert　once　wont　to　fill　my　soul，　but　who　now　hidest　thy　face　from　me，
——　call　me　back　to　thee　；　be　silent　no　longer；　thy　silence　shall　not
delay　a　soul　which　thirsts　after　thee。　What　man　，　what　father，　could
be　angry　with　a　son　for　returning　to　him　suddenly　，　for　falling　on　his
neck，　and　exclaiming　，　〃I　am　here　again　，　my　father！　forgive　me　if
I　have　anticipated　my　journey　，　and　returned　before　the　appointed　time！
The　world　is　everywhere　the　same，——　a　scene　of　labour　and　pain　，　of
pleasure　and　reward　；　but　what　does　it　all　avail　？　I　am　happy　only　where
thou　art，　and　in　thy　presence　am　I　content　to　suffer　or　enjoy。〃　And　wouldst
thou，　heavenly　Father，　banish　such　a　child　from　thy　presence？

　　DECEMBER　1。　Wilhelm　，　the　man　about　whom　I　wrote　to　you——　that
man　so　enviable　in　his　misfortunes——　was　secretary　to　Charlotte's　father
；　and　an　unhappy　passion　for　her　which　he　cherished，　concealed，　and
at　length　discovered，　caused　him　to　be　dismissed　from　his　situation。
This　made　him　mad。　Think，　whilst　you　peruse　this　plain　narration　，　what
an　impression　the　circumstance　has　made　upon　me　！　But　it　was　related
to　me　by　Albert　with　as　much　calmness　as　you　will　probably　peruse　it。

　　DECEMBER　4。　I　implore　your　attention。　It　is　all　over　with　me。　I　can
support　this　state　no　longer。　To…day　I　was　sitting　by　Charlotte。　She　was
playing　upon　her　piano　a　succession　of　delightful　melodies，　with　such
intense　expression！　Her　little　sister　was　dressing　her　doll　upon　my　lap。
The　tears　came　into　my　eyes。　I　leaned　down，　and　looked　intently　at　her
wedding…ring：　my　tears　fell——　immediately　she　began　to　play　that　favourite，
that　divine　，　air　which　has　so　often　enchanted　me。　I　felt　fort　from
a　recollection　of　the　past，　of　those　bygone　days　when　that　air　was　familiar
to　me　；　and　then　I　recalled　all　the　sorrows　and　the　disappointments　which
I　had　since　endured。　I　paced　with　hasty　strides　through　the　room，　my
heart　became　convulsed　with　painful　emotions。　At　length　I　went　up　to　her，
and　exclaimed　With　eagerness，　〃For　Heaven's　sake　，　play　that　air　no
longer！〃　She　stopped　，　and　looked　steadfastly　at　me。　She　then　said，
with　a　smile　which　sunk　deep　into　my　heart，　〃Werther　，　you　are　ill：
your　dearest　food　is　distasteful　to　you。　But　go　，　I　entreat　you，　and
endeavour　to　pose　yourself。〃　I　tore　myself　away。　God　，　thou　seest
my　torments　，　and　wilt　end　them！

　　DECEMBER　6。　How　her　image　haunts　me　！　Waking　or　asleep　，　she　fills
my　entire　soul！　Soon　as　I　close　my　eyes，　here　，　in　my　brain，　where
all　the　nerves　of　vision　are　concentrated　，　her　dark　eyes　are　imprinted。
Here——　I　do　not　know　how　to　describe　it　；　but，　if　I　shut　my　eyes，
hers　are　immediately　before　me：　dark　as　an　abyss　they　open　upon　me　，
and　absorb　my　senses。

　　And　what　is　man　——　that　boasted　demigod　？　Do　not　his　powers　fail
when　he　most　requires　their　use　？　And　whether　he　soar　in　joy　，　or　sink
in　sorrow　，　is　not　his　career　in　both　inevitably　arrested？　And，　whilst
he　fondly　dreams　that　he　is　grasping　at　infinity，　does　he　not　feel　pelled
to　return　to　a　consciousness　of　his　cold，　monotonous　existence　？

　　THE　EDITOR　TO　THE　READER。

　　It　is　a　matter　of　extreme　regret　that　we　want　original　evidence　of
the　last　remarkable　days　of　our　friend；　and　we　are　，　therefore，　obliged
to　interrupt　the　progress　of　his　correspondence　，　and　to　supply　the　deficiency
by　a　connected　narration。

　　I　have　felt　it　my　duty　to　collect　accurate　information　from　the　mouths
of　persons　well　acquainted　with　his　history。　The　story　is　simple；　and
all　the　accounts　agree，　except　in　some　unimportant　particulars。　It　is
true，　that　，　with　respect　to　the　characters　of　the　persons　spoken　of，
opinions　and　judgments　vary。

　　We　have　only，　then　，　to　relate　conscientiously　the　facts　which　our
diligent　labour　has　enabled　us　to　collect　，　to　give　the　letters　of　the
deceased，　and　to　pay　particular　attention　to　the　slightest　fragment　from
his　pen　，　more　especially　as　it　is　so　difficult　to　discover　the　real
and　correct　motives　of　men　who　are　not　of　the　mon　order。

　　Sorrow　and　discontent　had　taken　deep　root　in　Werther's　soul　，　and
gradually　imparted　their　character　to　his　whole　being。　The　harmony　of
his　mind　became　pletely　disturbed；　a　perpetual　excitement　and　mental
irritation，　which　weakened　his　natural　powers，　produced　the　saddest
etfects　upon　him，　and　rendered　him　at　length　the　victim　of　an　exhaustion
against　which　he　struggled　with　still　more　painful　efforts　than　he　had
displayed　，　even　in　contending　with　his　other　misfortunes。　His　mental
anxiety　weakened　his　various　good　qualities　；　and　he　was　soon　converted
into　a　gloomy　panion　，　always　unhappy　and　unjust　in　his　ideas　，　the
more　wretched　he　became。　This　was　，　at　least　，　the　opinion　of　Albert's
friends。　They　assert，　moreover　，　that　the　character　of　Albert　himself
had　undergone　no　change　in　the　meantime　：　he　was　still　the　same　being
whom　Werther　had　loved，　honoured　，　and　respected　from　the　mencement。
His　love　for　Charlotte　was　unbounded：　he　was　proud　of　her，　and　desired
that　she　should　be　recognised　by　every　one　as　the　noblest　of　created　beings。
Was　he，　however，　to　blame　for　wishing　to　avert　from　her　every　appearance
of　suspicion？　or　for　his　unwillingness　to　share　his　rich　prize　with　another，
even　for　a　moment　，　and　in　the　most　innocent　manner？　It　is　asserted
that　Albert　frequently　retired　from　his　wife's　apartment　during　Werther's
visits；　but　this　did　not　arise　from　hatred　or　aversion　to　his　friend　，
but　only　from　a　feeling　that　his　presence　was　oppressive　to　Werther。

　　Charlotte's　father，　who　was　confined　to　the　house　by　indisposition，
was　accustomed　to　send　his　carriage　for　her　，　that　she　might　make　excursions
in　the　neighbourhood。　One　day　the　weather　had　been　unusually　severe　，
and　the　whole　country　was　covered　with　snow。

　　Werther　went　for　Charlotte　the　following　morning，　in　order　that，
if　Albert　were　absent　，　he　might　conduct　her　home。

　　The　beautiful　weather　produced　but　little　impression　on　his　troubled
spirit。　A　heavy　weight　lay　upon　his　soul，　deep　melancholy　had　taken　possession
of　him，　and　his　mind　knew　no　change　save　from　one　painful　thought　to
another。

　　As　he　now　never　enjoyed　internal　peace，　the　condition　of　his　fellow
creatures　was　to　him　a　perpetual　source　of　trouble　and　distress。　He　believed
he　had　disturbed　the　happiness　of　Albert　and　his　wife　；　and，　whilst
he　censured　himself　strongly　for　this　，　he　began　to　entertain　a　secret
dislike　to　Albert。

　　His　thoughts　were　occasionally　directed　to　this　point。　〃Yes　，〃　he
would　repeat　to　himself　，　with　ill…concealed　dissatisfaction　，　〃yes　，
this　is　，　after　all，　the　extent　of　that　confiding　，　dear　，　tender　，
and　sympathetic　love，　that　calm　and　eternal　fidelity　！　What　do　I　behold
but　satiety　and　indifference？　Does　not　every　frivolous　engagement　attract
him　more　than　his　charming　and　lovely　wife？　Does　he　know　how　to　prize
his　happiness　？　Can　he　value　her　as　she　deserves　？　He　possesses　her　，
it　is　true，　I　know　that，　as　I　know　much　more，　and　I　have　bee　accustomed
to　the　thought　that　he　will　drive　me　mad，　or　，　perhaps，　murder　me。
Is　his　friendship　toward　me　unimpaired？　Does　he　not　view　my　attachment
to　Charlotte　as　an　infringement　upon　his　rights　，　and　consider　my　attention
to　her　as　a　silent　rebuke　to　himself？　I　know　，　and　indeed　feel，　that
he　dislikes　me，　that　he　wishes　for　my　absence，　that　my　presence　is　hateful
to　him。〃

　　He　would　often　pause　when　on　his　way　to　visit　Charlotte　，　stand　still，
as　though　in　doubt，　and　seem　desirous　of　returning　，　but　would　nevertheless
proceed　；　and，　engaged　in　such　thoughts　and　soliloquies　as　we　have　described，
he　finally　reached　the　hunting…lodge，　with　a　sort　of　involuntary　consent。

　　Upon　one　occasion　he　entered　the　house；　and，　inquiring　for　Charlotte，
he　observed　that　the　inmates　were　in　a　state　of　unusual　confusion。　The
eldest　boy　informed　him　that　a　dreadful　misfortune　had　occurred　at　Walheim，
——　that　a　peasant　had　been　murdered　！　But　this　made　little　impression
upon　him。　Entering　the　apartment，　he　found　Charlotte　engaged　reasoning
with　her　father　，　who，　in　spite　of　his　infirmity，　insisted　on　going
to　the　scene　of　the　crime　，　in　order　to　institute　an　inquiry。　The　criminal
was　unknown　；　the　victim　had　been　found　dead　at　his　own　door　that　morning。
Suspicions　were　excited　：　the　murdered　man　had　been　in　the　service　of
a　widow　，　and　the　person　who　had　previously　filled　the　situation　had
been　dismissed　from　her　employment。

　　As　soon　as　Werther　heard　this　，　he　exclaimed　with　great　excitement，
〃Is　it　possible　！　I　must　go　to　the　spot——　I　cannot　delay　a　moment！
〃　He　hastened　to　Walheim。　Every　incident　returned　vividly　to　his　remembrance
；　and　he　entertained　not　the　slightest　doubt　that　that　man　was　the　murderer
to　whom　he　had　so　often　spoken，　and　for　whom　he　entertained　so　much　regard。
His　way　took　him　past　the　well…known　lime　trees　，　to　the　house　where
the　body　had　been　carried　；　and　his　feelings　were　greatly　excited　at
the　sight　of　the　fondly　recollected　spot。　That　threshold　where　the　neighbours'
children　had　so　often　played　together　was　stained　with　blood；　love　and
attachment，　the　noblest　feelings　of　human　nature　，　had　been　converted
into　violence　and　murder。　The　huge　trees　stood　there　leafless　and　covered
with　hoarfrost；　the　beautiful　hedgerows　which　surrounded　the　old　churchyard
wall　were　withered；　and　the　gravestones，　half　covered　with　snow　，　were
visible　through　the　openings。

　　As　he　approached　the　inn，　in　front　of　which　the　whole　village　was
assembled　，　screams　were　suddenly　heard。　A　troop　of　armed　peasants　was
seen　approaching，　and　every　one　exclaimed　that　the　criminal　had　been
apprehended。　Werther　looked　，　and　was　not　long　in　doubt。　The　prisoner
was　no　other　than　the　servant　，　who　had　been　formerly　so　attached　to
the　widow　，　and　whom　he　had　met　prowling　about　，　with　that　suppressed
anger　and　ill…concealed　despair　，　which　we　have　before　described。

　　〃What　have　you　done　，　unfortunate　man？〃　inquired　Werther，　as　he
advanced　toward　the　prisoner。　The　latter　turned　his　eyes　upon　him　in　silence，
and　then　replied　with　perfect　posure　；　〃No　one　will　now　marry　her　，
and　she　will　marry　no　one。〃　The　prisoner　was　taken　into　the　inn　，　and
Werther　left　the　place。　The　mind　of　Werther　was　fearfully　excited　by　this
shocking　occurrence。　He　ceased，　however，　to　be　oppressed　by　his　usual
feeling　of　melancholy　，　moroseness　，　and　indifference　to　everything
that　passed　around　him。　He　entertained　a　strong　degree　of　pity　for　the
prisoner，　and　was　seized　with　an　indescribable　anxiety　to　save　him　from
his　impending　fate。　He　considered　him　so　unfortunate，　he　deemed　his　crime
so　excusable，　and　thought　his　own　condition　so　nearly　similar，　that
he　felt　convinced　he　could　make　every　one　else　view　the　matter　in　the
light　in　which　he　saw　it　himself。　He　now　became　anxious　to　undertake　his
defence　，　and　menced　posing　an　eloquent　speech　for　the　occasion
；　and，　on　his　way　to　the　hunting…lodge，　he　could　not　refrain　from　speaking
aloud　the　statement　which　he　resolved　to　make　to　the　judge。

　　Upon　his　arrival，　he　found　Albert　had　been　before　him：　and　he　was
a　little　perplexed　by　this　meeting；　but　he　soon　recovered　himself，　and
expressed　his　opinion　with　much　warmth　to　the　judge。　The　latter　shook　，
his　head　doubtingly　；　and　although　Werther　urged　his　case　with　the　utmost
zeal，　feeling，　and　determination　in　defence　of　his　client　，　yet，　as
we　may　easily　suppose　，　the　judge　was　not　much　influenced　by　his　appeal。
On　the　contrary　，　he　interrupted　him　in　his　address，　reasoned　with　him
seriously　，　and　even　administered　a　rebuke　to　him　for　being　the　advocate
of　a　murderer。　He　demonstrated，　that　，　according　to　this　precedent，
every　law　might　be　violated　，　and　the　public　security　utterly　destroyed。
He　added，　moreover　，　that　in　such　a　case　he　could　himself　do　nothing，
without　incurring　the　greatest　responsibility　；　that　everything　must
follow　in　the　usual　course，　and　pursue　the　ordinary　channel。

　　Werther　，　however，　did　not　abandon　his　enterprise　，　and　even　besought
the　judge　to　connive　at　the　flight　of　the　prisoner。　But　this　proposal
was　peremptorily　rejected。　Albert　，　who　had　taken　some　part　in　the　discussion，
coincided　in　opinion　with　the　judge。　At　this　Werther　became　enraged　，
and　took　his　leave　in　great　anger　，　after　the　judge　had　more　than　once
assured　him　that　the　prisoner　could　not　be　saved。

　　The　excess　of　his　grief　at　this　assurance　may　be　inferred　from　a　note
we　have　found　amongst　his　papers，　and　which　was　doubtless　written　upon
this　very　occasion。

　　〃You　cannot　be　saved，　unfortunate　man！　I　see　clearly　that　we　cannot
be　saved！〃

　　Werther　was　highly　incensed　at　the　observations　which　Albert　had　made
to　the　judge　in　this　matter　of　the　prisoner。　He　thought　he　could　detect
therein　a　little　bitterness　toward　himself　personally　；　and　although　，
upon　reflection　，　it　could　not　escape　his　sound　judgment　that　their　view
of　the　matter　was　correct　，　he　felt　the　greatest　possible　reluctance
to　make　such　an　admission。

　　A　memorandum　of　Werther's　upon　this　point　，　expressive　of　his　general
feelings　toward　Albert，　has　been　found　amongst　his　papers。

　　〃What　is　the　use　of　my　continually　repeating　that　he　is　a　good　and
estimable　man　？　He　is　an　inward　torment　to　me，　and　I　am　incapable　of
being　just　toward　him。〃

　　One　fine　evening　in　winter，　when　the　weather　seemed　inclined　to　thaw，
Charlotte　and　Albert　were　returning　home　together。　The　former　looked　from
time　to　time　about　her，　as　if　she　missed　Werther's　pany。　Albert　began
to　speak　of　him　，　and　censured　him　for　his　prejudices。　He　alluded　to
his　unfortunate　attachment，　and　wished　it　were　possible　to　discontinue
his　acquaintance。　〃I　desire　it　on　our　own　account　，〃　he　added；　〃and
I　request　you　will　pel　him　to　alter　his　deportment　toward　you，　and
to　visit　you　less　frequently。　The　world　is　censorious　，　and　I　know　that
here　and　there　we　are　spoken　of。〃　Charlotte　made　no　reply　，　and　Albert
seemed　to　feel　her　silence。　At　least，　from　that　time　he　never　again　spoke
of　Werther；　and，　when　she　introduced　the　subject，　he　allowed　the　conversation
to　die　away　，　or　else　he　directed　the　discourse　into　another　channel。

　　The　vain　attempt　Werther　had　made　to　save　the　unhappy　murderer　was
the　last　feeble　glimmering　of　a　flame　about　to　be　extinguished。　He　sank
almost　immediately　afterward　into　a　state　of　gloom　and　inactivity　，　until
he　was　at　length　brought　to　perfect　distraction　by　learning　that　he　was
to　be　summoned　as　a　witness　against　the　prisoner，　who　asserted　his　plete
innocence。

　　His　mind　now　became　oppressed　by　the　recollection　of　every　misfortune
of　his　past　life。　The　mortification　he　had　suffered　at　the　ambassador's，
and　his　subsequent　troubles　，　were　revived　in　his　memory。　He　became　utterly
inactive。　Destitute　of　energy　，　he　was　cut　off　from　every　pursuit　and
occupation　which　pose　the　business　of　mon　life；　and　he　became　a
victim　to　his　own　susceptibility，　and　to　his　restless　passion　for　the
most　amiable　and　beloved　of　women　，　whose　peace　he　destroyed。　In　this
unvarying　monotony　of　existence　his　days　were　consumed；　and　his　powers
became　exhausted　without　aim　or　design，　until　they　brought　him　to　a　sorrowful
end。

　　A　few　letters　which　he　left　behind，　and　which　we　here　subjoin，　afford
the　best　proofs　of　his　anxiety　of　mind　and　of　the　depth　of　his　passion，
as　well　as　of　his　doubts　and　struggles，　and　of　his　weariness　of　life。

　　DECEMBER　12。　Dear　Wilhelm　，　I　am　reduced　to　the　condition　of　those
unfortunate　wretches　who　believe　they　are　pursued　by　an　evil　spirit。　Sometimes
I　am　oppressed，　not　by　apprehension　or　fear，　but　by　an　inexpressible
internal　sensation，　which　weighs　upon　my　heart　，　and　impedes　my　breath！
Then　I　wander　forth　at　night，　even　in　this　tempestuous　season，　and　feel
pleasure　in　surveying　the　dreadful　scenes　around　me。

　　Yesterday　evening　I　went　forth。　A　rapid　thaw　had　suddenly　set　in：
I　had　been　informed　that　the　river　had　risen，　that　the　brooks　had　all
overflowed　their　banks，　and　that　the　whole　vale　of　Walheim　was　under
water　！　Upon　the　stroke　of　twelve　I　hastened　forth。　I　beheld　a　fearful
sight。　The　foaming　torrents　rolled　from　the　mountains　in　the　moonlight，
——　fields　and　meadows　，　trees　and　hedges　，　were　confounded　together
；　and　the　entire　valley　was　converted　into　a　deep　lake　，　which　was　agitated
by　the　roaring　wind　！　And　when　the　moon　shone　forth，　and　tinged　the
black　clouds　with　silver，　and　the　impetuous　torrent　at　my　feet　foamed
and　resounded　with　awful　and　grand　impetuosity，　I　was　overe　by　a　mingled
sensation　of　apprehension　and　delight。　With　extended　arms　I　looked　down
into　the　yawning　abyss，　and　cried，　〃Plunge！'〃　For　a　moment　my　senses
forsook　me，　in　the　intense　delight　of　ending　my　sorrows　and　my　sufferings
by　a　plunge　into　that　gulf！　And　then　I　felt　as　if　I　were　rooted　to　the
earth　，　and　incapable　of　seeking　an　end　to　my　woes　！　But　my　hour　is
not　yet　e：　I　feel　it　is　not。　O　Wilhelm，　how　willingly　could　I　abandon
my　existence　to　ride　the　whirlwind，　or　to　embrace　the　torrent！　and　then
might　not　rapture　perchance　be　the　portion　of　this　liberated　soul　？

　　I　turned　my　sorrowful　eyes　toward　a　favourite　spot，　where　I　was　accustomed
to　sit　with　Charlotte　beneath　a　willow　after　a　fatiguing　walk。　Alas　！
it　was　covered　with　water　，　and　with　difficulty　I　found　even　the　meadow。
And　the　fields　around　the　hunting…lodge　，　thought　I。　Has　our　dear　bower
been　destroyed　by　this　unpitying　storm？　And　a　beam　of　past　happiness
streamed　upon　me，　as　the　mind　of　a　captive　is　illumined　by　dreams　of
flocks　and　herds　and　bygone　joys　of　home！　But　I　am　free　from　blame。　I
have　courage　to　die　！　Perhaps　I　have　，——　but　I　still　sit　here　，　like
a　wretched　pauper　，　who　collects　fagots，　and　begs　her　bread　from　door
to　door　，　that　she　may　prolong　for　a　few　days　a　miserable　existence　which
she　is　unwilling　to　resign。

　　DECEMBER　15。　What　is　the　matter　with　me　，　dear　Wilhelm　？　I　am　afraid
of　myself　！　Is　not　my　love　for　her　of　the　purest　，　most